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Thromby College

We want all of our staff to treat our passengers consistently. For that reason we provide a range of online resources to educate them in “The Thromby Way.”

  • The Big Picture November 15, 2012 We often hear pilots bleating about the direction of our company.  Well, it’s about time someone explained the big picture to them. Thromby Air – It Ain’t Picasso.
  • Maintaining Currency July 29, 2012 Our Flight Training Department delivers cost-effective recurrent training to our pilots.   Thromby Air Flight Training – Maintaining Currency
  • #Boosters March 7, 2012 At Thromby Air we know that some Social Media commentators can be bought.  Who needs rationality, clear thought and incisive fair minded analysis when recognition and free stuff is at stake?  Thromby Air – Everyone Has Their Price.
  • Random Departure Times November 29, 2011 Keeping passengers guessing about the departure time of their flight is an excellent way to maximise revenue — passengers who have missed their flight will then have to buy a short-notice (high price) ticket on a later flight.  Too easy! Thromby Air – Unpredictability Is A Virtue  
  • Asterisk Police November 24, 2011 Despite the long and glorious history of the asterisk, occasionally airlines forget the rules of the game… Thromby Air – We Don’t Give A **** * – Asterisks still have to be explained… a fact that some airlines forget!
  • Passenger Convenience Fee November 17, 2011 New employees bring new ideas to help us spirit away our passengers’ cash… Thromby Air: Getting Into The Spirit
  • Fresh Air Genius October 24, 2011 When Robert E. Coli went on holidays he kicked an old kettle on the beach, and found a new and very talented employee… Thromby Air – Be Careful What You Wish For!
  • Highway Robbery September 21, 2011 Success in the Low Cost airline game requires special skills, for which we are always on the lookout… Thromby Air – Stick ‘Em Up!
  • Write Brothers August 30, 2011 A rare archival photo shows the role of the media in aviation…   Thromby Air – Two Nongs Make A Write
  • Fright Insurance August 28, 2011 Insurance is all about fear.  Increasing your passengers’ fear and discomfort is an excellent way to increase our Flight Insurance ancillary revenues… Thromby Air – Flight AND Fright!
  • Trough Lollies August 21, 2011 At Thromby Air we know that maintaining good relationships with people in positions of power is all about “give and take.”  We give them some presents and they take their instructions. Thromby Air – Friend of The Gifted    
  • Thromby Aerodynamics August 16, 2011 An airline like Thromby must have a sound understanding of the forces that keep planes moving through the sky…
  • Monkeynomics August 6, 2011 There is a great deal of science involved in maximizing revenue extracted from our passengers.  To this end we conduct a range of tests on representative beasts… Thromby Air – We Are Not The Animals Monkeynomics, the study of similarities between humans and monkeys in their economic decision making, really does exist!
  • Need To Know Engineering August 5, 2011 Our engineers enjoy passing the benefits of their training to the younger generation… Thromby Air – Do You Need to Know?  
  • Tastes Like Check-In July 10, 2011 We know that people will do just about anything to reduce their weight prior to our Pay By The Pound check-in procedure.  These people will be very hungry… do not miss the opportunity to sell them some expensive “food!” Thromby Air: The Industry’s Shortest Weighting Times
  • Modern Management Strategy June 28, 2011 At the weekly management meeting CEO Robert E. Coli shares his old-school wisdom, outlining what was the latest in modern management strategy: “Rather than have the whole company working as a team, we will split the company into bits and ditch the worst performing part!  Absolute freaking genius, eh?” Thromby Air – Slicing the Pie in ...
  • Sales Holding Pattern June 26, 2011 Maximizing revenue extraction from our passengers is a team sport! Thromby Air – Pay Up or Hold ‘Till You’re Old!
  • Avoiding Baggage Fees June 17, 2011 We have determined that some cunning individuals are trying to avoid paying our baggage fees.  For example, the new “Weekend At Bernie’s” luggage range allows them to carry 150 pounds of belongings for the price of a seat.  This is unacceptable, and requires vigilance from check-in staff. Thromby Air – We’ll Treat Your Carcass Like Baggage
  • Re: Payment June 4, 2011 You must repay the money we have spent on your expensive training, and your repayments will be deducted from your salary.  Don’t worry… we’ll give you as many years as you need to pay us back for our generosity. Thromby Air – Servitude With A Smile
  • Tame Reporters May 27, 2011 A tame reporter has neither the time nor the desire to seek the truth.  Therefore you can use them — a tame reporter will write what you say, call it news, and thank you afterward. Thromby Air – Always Making The News
  • Emission Trading Schemers May 26, 2011 While you might think that the price of fuel naturally gives incentives to improve efficiency and reduce carbon emissions, a tricky new game has been invented to do exactly the same thing.  We thought there must be more to it so we went to the Game Fair to investigate Emission Trading Schemes… Thromby Air – Soon ...
  • Pilot Recruitment Roadshow May 19, 2011 Thromby Air’s recruitment roadshow informs potential pilots about the glamorous life of the modern airline pilot, including remuneration, training fee repayment schedules, and career enhancement options. Thromby Pilot Careers… Find Us Between The Other Bs!
  • Da Low Cost Code April 21, 2011 Even the best minds are sometimes perplexed by our hidden fees… Thromby Air – We’d Make Leonardo Proud
  • The Power of the Press Release April 16, 2011 In this age of cut-price journalism the news services love getting Press Releases.  Develop good relationships with the media and write your press release well, so they can pretend they wrote it themselves. Remember, the “News” is what we tell them. Thromby Air – The Muse for News
  • Talking To The Press March 24, 2011 As a Thromby spokesperson it is important that you learn how to make words without actually saying anything.  Here our CEO, Robert E. Coli, demonstrates this ancient Public Relations skill… Thromby Air – Spin to Win!
  • Seat Pitch February 22, 2011 “Seat pitch” is the particular tone people use when complaining about how close together the seats are on a Thromby aircraft. Thromby Air – In Harmony With Shareholder Profits
  • Pilot Pay Negotiations February 10, 2011 Wage negotiations can be longwinded and complex. Or not. (It helps if you know which buttons to push!) * The word “intention” has no concrete meaning, as intentions can change like the wind. It is therefore a PERFECT word for a negotiator to use. It’s origins come from “In Tent”… beware of the negotiator using this word ...
  • Cabin Crew Graduation February 9, 2011 We dont expect* you to be with us for a long time, and we know that you are easily replaced. Having said that… welcome to the Thromby family! * or want Thromby Air: Glamourous Professions for the Young
  • Credit Card Payment Charge January 20, 2011 Why do we add a payment charge when you pay us, when really we should simply be grateful for your payment? Because it makes us even more grateful!   Thromby Air – Thankyou for your Payment(s).
  • Baggage Fees December 15, 2010 It is only fair that we occasionally slap you with a tiny little surcharge if you are so disorganised that you cannot go on a holiday without a suitcase. Yes, these charges are annoying and inconvenient, but we are doing our best to cope. Thromby Air – Helping To Lighten Your Load
  • Call Centre Training November 30, 2010 Our top notch training provides our telephone sales and customer service representatives the skills and knowledge they need. Thromby Air – A Global Employer
  • Cabin Crew Training November 16, 2010 Our world class cabin crew training facility will ensure that you have the skills required of a Thromby flight attendant.* * After our intensive 3 hour training program you will be fully qualified to handle any passenger loading emergency. Thromby Air – Training Without The Bull
  • Social Media Department October 29, 2010 We have hired experts in squeezing out messages and hurling them through the airwaves, so that we can keep our passengers informed about what we think of them… The benefits have not been immediately apparent. See the Infinite Monkey Theorem on Wikipedia for proof that our Social Media strategy will work, eventually.   Thromby Air – Monkeys Making Shakespeare   Protect ...
  • Birth of an Airline September 10, 2010 Robert Edward Coli longed to get out of the family business but couldn’t think of another job that would utilise his skills and experience. Nonetheless he sold the company and sought out new ventures. Eventually he started a business that used his expertise in packing as many smelly creatures as possible into a tin can… ...
  • Scent Marketing September 9, 2010 CEO Robert E. Coli discusses Thromby’s new strategy to increase ancilliary revenue: “We’ve got to sell stuff on our flights. Our shareholders demand it, but they haven’t tasted our coffee or croissants. As you know, our coffee can strip paint and our croissants taste like they were squeezed out by a dog.” “Luckily, our scientists ...
  • The Asterisk* August 27, 2010 The favourite tool of our legal and marketing departments, the asterisk was originally an “ideogram” used by the ancient Egyptians. When the discovery of the Rosetta stone allowed translation of ancient hieroglyphs it was revealed that the * symbol carried the meaning “tighter than a cat’s….” Although today the asterisk is used to separate marketing spin ...
  • Corporate Philosophy August 2, 2010 Thromby Air CEO Robert E. Coli recently gave his famous “People Are Like Tubes of Toothpaste” motivational speech to a recent intake of eager trainees…